Ask Emma: Classroom Crush

Dear Emma,

There’s a boy that was in one of my classes last semester that I used to talk to. I didn’t think anything of it because we were just really good friends. Now that we don’t have class together, I never really see him and I can’t get him out of my head.  I didn’t realize I liked him until he was gone.  I’ve asked him to hang out tons of times but it never seems to work out and he doesn’t seem to be as into it as I am.  I can’t get him out of my head and I don’t know what else to do.



Dear Desperate,

Stop being desperate! Usually, boys don’t think about girls as much as girls think about boys.  They just don’t.  So, while you’re thinking about him all day, he’s probably playing video games and thinking about what he’s going to have for lunch.  Your time and energy would be much better spent on something more valuable to yourself, such as school, work, your friends, a hobby or a sport.  This boy was a good friend to you, but there are tons of other good friends out there that will make the effort that he isn’t making.  If you keep wasting your time on this boy, you’ll miss out on another great one.



Dear Emma,

My ex and I broke up a few months ago and it was really messy.  We didn’t talk for a while, but last week we talked at the bar and then hooked up.  He said he misses me and it’s very confusing.  I’m not sure how I feel about it, but I feel like I can’t talk to my friends about it.  Whenever I bring up my ex, my friends all roll their eyes or judge everything I say.  It makes me feel like I can’t talk to them about anything regarding him, which sucks because I know I still have feelings for him.  What do I say to them?

-Feeling Alone


Dear Feeling Alone,

Friends are supposed to be the people in your life that you can go to without fear of judgment.  These thoughts about your ex should be addressed because if you bottle them up, they’re going to hurt you and make things worse.  Since you feel like you have nobody to talk to, you most likely suppress those feelings and then end up more confused than you should be.  You should definitely tell your friends that you feel like you can’t talk to them about this when you should be able to and see what they say.  If they’re true friends, they’ll be there for you no matter what their personal opinions are on the matter.  Your friends don’t always have to agree with your decisions, but they should support you no matter what.


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