Despite Fordham’s identity as a Jesuit university, the ever-present college hook-up culture makes it difficult for those looking for a relationship. Girls and guys alike wonder what the next step is and how to get what they want out of relationships. Everybody is different, so there is no foolproof method. However, the following five points will hopefully help you out.

1. Know what you and the other person involved want.
This does not mean pick up your phone right now and ask the person to define the relationship. This will likely scare the pants off the other person. It is very important to not conceal your feelings because this will only result in a mess that could have been avoided. Yes, this means if you are hooking up with someone you want to date, acting like it is cool with you to be treated like a hook-up is the wrong thing to do.
2. Do not put too much stock in social media.
Texting in any stage of a relationship can be overwhelming. Don’t be afraid to text someone who you’re interested in, and don’t look too much into the punctuation or wording. If the emphasis is kept off of texting from the beginning, it will prevent a problem from arising. It is also important not to try to connect a person’s Facebook status or tweets to your personal interactions with them; these two things may be entirely unrelated.
3. You do not want to be with someone who does not want to be with you.
It is so enticing to want what you can’t have, but when you really think about it, why would you want to be around someone who would rather be with someone else? If a person consistently doesn’t give you his or her full attention when spending time with you (i.e. texting and not listening), this is a good indicator that you are not at the top of his or her list. Nobody deserves attention that they wouldn’t give to you.
4. Be confident.
This point is not just for people who haven’t found anyone yet. Even when you’re in a relationship, insecurity causes many problems. Know that you are smart, unique and amazing, and if someone else disagrees with you, he or she is not someone whom you should be around.
5. Don’t be afraid to push your limits.
Sometimes walking up to someone you don’t know and striking up a conversation, or even telling your significant other that something they are doing is upsetting you, takes guts. In these types of situations, you need to push your limits to be as happy as possible. Sometimes you have to take risks to get what you want.