In recent months, social media has honed in on a new archetype: the performative male. But what exactly is a performative male? He can usually be spotted at a used book store, thrift store or record shop. Depending on the individual in question, he will probably wear baggy pants and a tight shirt, listen to music through wired headphones (likely Clairo or Lana Del Rey), carry a tote bag and always have an iced matcha in hand. His Trader Joe’s tote bag may be filled with books by iconic female authors, such as Sylvia Plath, Jane Austen, Sally Rooney and Joan Didion. Finally, he’ll always have a box of tampons on hand just in case, and of course, can’t forget his signature LABUBU.
But what exactly is the problem with the performative male? On the outside, he seems like an avid reader who has good taste in music and respects women. The problem, however, lies between his wired headphones. Despite his perfectly curated aesthetic, he is not an authentic feminist. The “performative” aspect of the facade showcases that he either does not read or does not understand those books he carries around, likely does not truly enjoy his matcha and the weight of his tote bag is probably hurting his arm. All of his “progressive” acts are performative. They are pretending to be allies to women so they can attract them. It is comparable to an in-person catfish.
The motivation behind the performative male is simple: in a society where conservatism is on the rise, many men want to separate themselves from the frequent misogyny shown by their gender and attempt to stand out. This in itself is not a bad thing. It’s important to be upfront about your political beliefs when you’re pursuing a relationship with somebody. With that being said, it is the motivation behind the performative male that makes a difference. They are not allied with women; they want to attract women. Since men stereotypically identify as conservative, liberal women may be more interested in men who show signs of being a feminist, but if those men are not authentically who they say they are, then they are doing more harm than good. Pretending to be experts on things that they actually know nothing about can cause emotional damage, relationship troubles and is just flat-out annoying. In reality, their actions are no different than the conservative men that they are trying to distance themselves from. They are using deception to gain control over women.
Performative activism in general is not uncommon, especially on the internet. People want to seem like they’re helping others and come off as good people, when really, they are not doing anything. Many internet users seem to believe that just because they, for example, use a hashtag online, they are automatically making a difference, even if they haven’t truly done anything. Performative men are just the latest addition to this trend. The goal is to have the aesthetic of activism, without actually having to do any work. They want the credit without giving any meaningful effort.
There’s nothing wrong with the aesthetic of the performative male, as long as there is authentic intent behind it. Are they reading the book or simply looking at it? Are they carrying around tampons because they care about women or because they want attention? Do they collect Clairo vinyls because they like her as an artist or because they want to attract women? Feminism is more than just an aesthetic; it’s a movement. In order to be a part of it, you have to actually contribute something other than empty matcha cups.
For any performative readers, please spend some time actually reading books by female authors. They have a lot of great thoughts that could be incredibly beneficial to society if they’re actually understood, and it’s impossible to fully comprehend literature if you’re lifting weights at the same time. At the end of the day, true activism is not how you appear, but about what you do, even when no one is watching.
Julia Cholerton, FCRH ’28, is a English and classical civilizations double major from Gig Harbor, Washington.
